How do you deal with family members who don't like your name choices?

Question

My fiance and I have picked out names that we are in love with. We narrowed down our lists to Lucian, Dante, or Cillian for a boy and Lilith, Melinda, Adelina or Rosalind for a girl. We have a family member who is constantly saying that the names we are choosing are disgusting and that our children will never live down the horrible names we've chosen. She says that they'll probably try to have their names changed when they are older. She also says that if we choose one of the names that we like, she'll just call the baby something that she thinks is more appropriate and age friendly. She also keeps suggesting the names Aidenne Miliegh for a girl and Chance August for a boy. I don't want to be mean to her because she is so close to my fiance, but how do I get her to stop? Has anyone else dealt with a similar situation? How did you handle it?

Answer 1

ACTUALLY her name choices are much worse than any of yours, names like Dante, Lilith and Adelina are beautiful names that kids think are cool to have. however..



Aidenne (Aiden) is a boy name no matter how you spell it, it's also a very popular boy name, so when your daughter not only has to re-spell her name for the 1000th time to her teacher she will also have to bare the embarrassment that 2 other boys in her class have her name. When I saw Miliegh, I thought of a millipede.



Chance August, many people will just give this a "wtf" look at it. Both a virtual names which don't go well together, I doubt when everyone in school asks each other their middle name, that the boy will be proud to say "August"







When you finally pick the name you want, keep it to yourself until the end of your pregnancy, and whenever she makes 'suggestions' just ignore them by changing the subject or something.

Answer 2

Although it's hard not to talk about very special future events and your plans for them, it might be best in this case to stop talking about your name choices to anyone you think will be critical. If this family member brings up the subject of baby names when you haven't, try saying things like "Well, April is still a long way off!" and change the subject.



As for the names you're considering, I wouldn't use Lilith or Cillian, but the others are perfectly good names with positive connotations. (I especially like Melinda and Rosalind.) I can't imagine that anyone with one of those names would hate it or want to change it. This relative is evidently just projecting her own prejudices. As for her suggestions, do you think she's serious?!



If, when the baby arrives, she really does try to call him or her by some name of her own choosing instead of the name you and your fiance have chosen, you might tell her politely that you can't risk confusing the baby that way and can't bring it to see her if she's going to do so.



BTW, how does she feel about her own name? If she doesn't like it, then the next time she brings up the subject of the baby's name, try saying, "Well, if it's a girl, maybe we'll just name her for you."



Finally, there's something you can do between now and April to give your baby a more stable family situation and a definite LAST name. You know what I mean! And then this relative can go postal over things like your choice of colors, music, reception food, etc.

Answer 3

Talk to your fiance about her and the problem and get other family members around and discuss the names, i mean since you have been talking about it with others right? However if you dont like what the close relative has to say talk to her about it.

Any whos the child is the Fiance and yours and you should embrace the names you have chosen from the begining and do what is best for your selves

DO NOT STRESS OVER WHAT OTHERS THINK :)

Answer 4

Why do you even care about this relatives opinion...please just let them talk and say what ever it takes to change the topic then just name YOUR child what you wish...because you two are the ones who are going to say it a bunch of times when she/ he is running around the house or whatever the case may be.



If they insist maybe they can give the child a family nick name like many people have... just make sure its a nice one.



Plus the names are lovely and unique almost I love Lilith its beautiful:)

Answer 5

i do no longer think of it concerns too lots. I actually have a buddy who has a sister named Jennifer and a cousin named Jennifer. My father is named Peter, I even have an uncle named Peter, and a cousin named Peter. My mom's call is Joan and that i've got an aunt named Joan. I even have cousins named Sarah and Dara (no longer sisters) and Dara even has a s-i-l named Tara! Does it quite remember in the event that they're comparable? No. In some families, as I even have shown, they re-use the right comparable call persistently lower back, that would annoy some, yet to others its a decision they make. you will desire to threaten to try this and propose your call as a astounding option (besides the certainty that this manner of thinking would desire to backfire horribly). If something your sister would desire to be commemorated to think of you will "call your baby after hers," that's a type and loving gesture (and a large thank you to think of roughly it).

Answer 6

When I had my youngest son, my family all hated the middle name I had chosen for him. Jaiden Azrael. Because Azrael basically means the angel of death. BUT I like the way his name sounds, Idc what it means and all those people can kiss it because he's MY son, not theirs.



I'm not sure if you can get her to stop, I mean, freedom of speech, personal choice, etc. I'm not sure how stubborn she is, but after a while everyone in my family got over my son's name because I had already named him and there was nothing anyone could do about it. Since your fiance is so close to her, get your fiance to try to talk to her about just keeping her rude and hateful comments to herself. In the end, if she doesn't, get up the courage to tell her if she doesn't stop her childishness, she is not allowed to see the baby until she grows up and can act like an adult. That's just what I would do. :)

Answer 7

Tell the relative that her opinion is not going to change what you name your child, and that if she cares about your fiance she will accept your choices and call your child by their given name.



Your could also tell her you will not be discussing baby names in the future, and keep your final decision a secret until after the baby is born.



Your last option is to outright ignore her, but in my experience that sometimes backfires.

Answer 8

Lol I like the suggestions of the other answers, but heres another one. Maybe u can talk to ure finacee about how her negative comments r rlly prying and annoying, and that ure child is not hers, and ask ure husbamd to talk to her since they r rlly close

Answer 9

Option 1- best option: ignore her.



if you can't totally ignore her (and it sounds like maybe you can't), then your next best options are:

Option 2- tell her you love the names she suggested. then tell everyone (including her) that the final decision will be a surprise. then name the baby whatever you want.

Option 3- tell her she is right. don't argue with her. then name the baby whatever you want.



your worst option is to argue with her. choose your battles. this ain't one of 'em.

Answer 10

Too late for you but that's why I never share my name choices. My family and friends learned my kids' names the day they were born.



Just ignore her or play with her some. Tell her you really like the names she suggested and are thinking of going with them...then name your child as you please.

Answer 11

I really like your choices (hers stink) and the most important think is that you and your fiance love them. Granny never liked my sibling's name and the folks just told her to deal, and not to make her opinion known to the child. If she won't back down if you ask politely for her to drop it, I think you might have to hardline it like that.

Answer 12

Take the notice of her.She wants you to call you're kids horribe names.The ones you've chosen are great.

Answer 13

Don't listen to them. It's your child and your opinion. Is it your fault if they don't like the name? No. So don't listen to them and follow your heart (Geez, that sounded cheesy ((BUT IT'S TRUE!!!))



=D

Answer 14

tell them to get over it

Answer 15

mess with her. its ur baby

Answer 16

..Tell them.......Mind their own Business!!...........PERIOD!!